Monday, November 7, 2011

Bad News, Bad Moods, Bumps & Curves, Hurt Feelings & Comfort Food - The Art of Effective Wallowing

OK - first yesterday morning I weighed in having lost another 1.9 pounds. That a total of 7.3 pounds in two weeks. Pretty good - yay. The doc and I didn't get around to measuring this weekend, but I'll get those digits for you as soon as I can. I know you are dying to know.

Now onto what I really want to write about.....

If you are one of those people who has have never had weight challenges, don't get your feelings occasionally hurt, don't understand the concept of comfort food or body image issues and deal with emotional stress like a pro athlete -  then this blog isn't for you. Stop reading now. If you are like the rest of us, read on.

This past week I was disappointed by a few pieces of less than awesome news and then compounded that by allowing myself to get my feelings hurt. I set myself up for it. I went out on a limb and it turns out sometimes when you do that, something breaks. Not a little ouch - "you mean you're mad at me?" - kinda feelings hurt, but more of the - "um well that hot fire poker plunged right into my heart seems to be melting my arteries" kinda hurt.

Whether it's due to family, career, school, love, or any other reason (and there are a LOT of reasons) - few things suck more than being disappointed and having your feelings really hurt. For those of us who battle weight, food is often an emotional Band-Aid. For goodness sakes - when we were little kids getting shots at the doctor, our reward was a lolly pop!

So how do we not let those kind of emotions/curves in the road of life totally derail us for weeks on end? How do you get up and get back to work productively after your boss eviscerates you in a review? How do you pick up the pieces of a suddenly shattered ego after your friend or family member takes an incredibly cheap shot? How do you deal with a temporarily broken heart?  How do you get back on the horse and not lose a week or two of fitness in the interim? How do you not let the little crap spoil the bigger plan - the one you are in charge of?

I call it the Art of Effective Wallowing.

You get 24 hours to wallow during which time absolutely nobody can shake you from the mood. Feel it all the way. Usually this is best accomplished on a weekend. I prefer Sundays. I recommend putting on the comfiest of clothes, procure a serving or two of your favorite comfort food (remember it's only for 24 hours and still limit portions) an unending supply of some sort of herbal tea, a box of tissues and wrapping yourself in the warmest blanket you can find. If you have pets, recruit them to the party.

THEN alternate between watching Wallow Inducing movies and Ass Kicking flicks. While the credits roll write all the reasons you are sad or mad out on paper. (Don't do it on your computer - you might be likely to send them to someone).  Yesterday I watched Crazy Stupid Love (Total Wallow Inducer) and HANNAH (Ultimate Ass Kicking Revenge Kinda Flick). I also plowed through a season of The Big C and Weeds.

After you simply cannot stand watching TV anymore.... take a totally indulgent nap... then take a hot bath or shower.... then take another nap. Think about going for a walk. Decide against it. Screw around on Facebook for a while, call a friend (who understands their job is to only listen) and whimper, play a round of Words with Friends with someone you don't know, watch something else on your DVR, re-read your list, re-write your list - and by that hour - it should be time to officially go to bed.

The next day? GET UP EARLY! Your workout must be completed by no later than 8 AM and I mean the kind of workout that truly kicks your ass. When blissfully filled with all those endorphins (After at least 45 minutes of truly elevated heart rate), re-read your list.
Not so bad today right? Wear something moderately colorful. Go to work or get productive in some manner by no later than 9 AM. Exhaust yourself with activity all day - and get at least one thing done you've been procrastinating. By the time you hit the sack, you will be a lot closer to getting back on track.

OK - admittedly, I'm only 50% of the way through my plan..... but it's 5:30 AM and I'm up and I'm heading to go knock out those eight miles I missed yesterday .... and I'm sure hoping this works. So Bad News, Bad Moods, Hurt Feelings be damned! This is a new week and it's time for these curves to kick some new tail.

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

A Power Blonde Gets Camera Ready - 1 Min - 5 Minute Makeover Not much more too it than that! Here's how I go from just a wee bit mid workday drab, to super camera cute for appearances like the ones on Huff Post Live! It's a five minute job if you start with the right tools. I'm a Laura Mercier and Nars kinda girl!